Calendars

Since the start of the term, I've actually begun using a calendar to organize myself. Every year I get some sort of organizing tool to make sure I don't procrastinate. Needless to say, it has always failed.

Surprisingly this year though, I've been pretty good at keeping myself in check. Note: pretty good. As in, I still procrastinate, just not as often. That aside, keeping things down on a monthly calendar serves more than just to organize my time. It puts a lot of things into perspective.

Aside from showing me what I need to do and when, the calendar also serves to chronicle the good days. For example, on September 24th, I finished my application for a teaching program abroad. One whole week ahead of schedule. I also managed to ask my professor for a reference letter a week earlier that I had planned. Feeling pretty good on September 24th. Feeling even better on October 7th when I went for an interview. I remember telling Pastor Andrew Friday October 1st about my upcoming interview and how he would pray for me. I also remember that after Ultimate the same day and booking it to BAC for 3D, I had a glass of iced tea waiting for me at the Annex. Most appreciated. After the interview, October 13th, went to mass for the first time on Campus. It was refreshing to hear Mass on Campus. Another good day. Sure a calendar is handy in highlighting the successes of the month, but its also just as effective in highlighting the failures. The frequent failures.

Every Tuesday, I should prepare for teaching PREP, but I don't. Even though its on my calendar. October 14th, should have had my paper done, not still in the process of doing it. October 9th, I should have picked an article to critique, to this day I have not. Aside from the general frequent failures, I can also see how fast I go from being thankful for the things I have, to being unappreciative of everything. Oct 22, Got a job. Was all in thanksgiving-mode for the blessings of a job in a pretty tough market. Oct 25th, already ungrateful. Thankful for the job, but not much for anything else. The week leading up to my interview, I had committed myself to praying every commute going to school and going back. Did pretty well that whole week. After interview, didn't happen so much, if at all. So much for being thankful.

Looking at it from a calendar, its amazing to see how often and how quickly I change. I can be devoted one day and not care the next. Organized or not. Successful or not. Calendars are brutal.